Bare Necessities

I am centered right now on the bare necessities. Yes, cue Baloo ;)!

I wrote a reflection for my book that I really thought should not be an entry because it was so stream of consciousness, but then I realized, you know what? People like that. Or at least I do. The realness. Your method of developing a goal or ritual! How you come to streamline life. And honestly, cause so much for me stems on this, how will I be ready for the apocalypse?

I am totally not a "Jesus is coming back on 'insert date here'" person. But I do believe things are going to get worse before they get better. I don't want to be knocked cold by darkness, lack of virtual information, inability to adjust to weather, hunger, thirst, gosh really Bonnie, conspiracy theory much? I know, I know. I think I've always been a survivalist at heart.

But you know who didn't have a place to lay his head? Jesus, my King. God of the universe came to live with us, and he was dependent on humans to give him a pillow.

The other day I was pleased with myself that I was narrowing down the necessary things in my life, and now I'm realizing that even my bed is a luxury.

I am very grateful to have a cozy home and family, but my life ultimately is hidden with Christ in God. Nothing, nothing trumps that! One of my favorite artists that I have listened to since I was a kid, sings about the Man, the "Man who came to live in time. He did happy things with water and new wine." The Man who "came to stay with me".

We still are the home of the God who became flesh. And the way we treat His creatures is the way we are treating him.

I read the other day that the verse, "Be still and know that I am God." is literally translated, "Let go and know that I am God."

Contentment is the root of joy! And giving ourselves to bring joy to others is the path towards Jesus! He was a Man of sorrows, yet He was full of exuberant life and joy as He became, completely willingly, one with us.

Illustration by https://www.etsy.com/shop/PrintsByShawn?ref=l2-shopheader-name

The Habit of Yoga

They say if you do something continually for at least 21 days, you develop a habit. I needed a project. I needed something to help me break my addiction to smoking. I love reading Julie Powell's honest and somewhat vulgar (which makes it better, by the way) memoir Julie and Julia about her year of cooking her way through Julia Child's recipes. How it saved her life and helped turning 30 be okay.

I stood outside one day in February 2016 with my tobacco pipe. And as I had done many other times (specifically because I was terrified of getting cancer), I asked God to help me quit. This time, maybe because I was really serious (although I didn't realize how serious I was at the time), the words "do yoga" implanted in my heart. That was my last time to smoke.

Every time I got an urge, was a little overstressed, or after a big meal; I would do yoga. I was demanding on myself at first, which was probably the best way to fight back the urges. (And I am telling you right now, I am a chemical junkie. I like my caffeine and moderate amounts of alcohol and I still use nicotine lozenges. So no I am not a magic story that all of a sudden I stretched a little and became the model of health. I have my little vices. They are just better under control.)

I literally think that the best thing yoga did for me was free me from the anxiety of both the urge and the action of smoking. Sure, I would get a zing of relaxation when I puffed that pipe. But the desperation before the puff and the yucky-ness I felt after really defeated the whole purpose of it to begin with. The endorphin release of moving my body and making my body stronger is a much more beautiful euphoria than after a smoke.

My snap shot impression of what yoga has done for me so far in these seven months is the relief of teeth gritting frustration, the freedom of feeling good and energetic. It has caused me to slow down and pay attention. It has empowered me to know when to say "yes" and when to say "no". And it has grown respect in me for myself and for my body. I now understand the gifts given by God that are in me to share with others.

Yoga makes me feel beautiful. Me, with my chunky tummy and upper arms. Me, with my double chin and drooping boobies. I stand tall. I smile. I walk in a radiance that I never knew before. And I'm happy!

Now, through the habit of yoga, my body lets me know what kind of poses to do in each practice; when it’s time to drink a smoothie; when it’s time to write a reflection.

It isn’t demanding, but gentle, and I step softly into the next right thing.

Illustration by https://www.etsy.com/shop/thelilyx?ref=l2-shopheader-name

On Beds & Bedrooms

So I read an article in Glamour or Cosmopolitan back in the early 2000s. A short and simple little article that embedded in me and became the root of my style of writing and my favorite concept "cozy."

I have tried to google key words from that article to see if I could find it. I used to have it cut out and glued in a scrapbook, but that got lost. So here I am trying to redeem the bits that I can remember, because it is my little acorn seed.

A couple fighting all odds for love. They move into a 200 square foot space that has one room with a tiny branch off for a kitchen and I'm sure an even tinier branch of bathroom. Hardwood floors, very rough I imagine. And their bed. The bed on which they did everything. Mounds of laundry sometimes covered it. Pizza in bed for dinner. Life took place on that bed. It was the centrality of them. Sometimes he would have to squeeze around her while she was next to the bed wobbling in downward-facing dog. And he left Gold Bond powdered footprints in his wake as he maneuvered past her.

And people would question their relationship and living situation and they would smile and relish in their tight, cramped space that fueled the close bond of their love.

I fell in love with the idea that the marriage bed holds the space of life.

The spot of love, of pillow talk and surprise kisses; the bed where new little lives are created and eventually wake you up with giggles or giddy meows or tail wags in the face.

My bed is my office, and my hubby sits a bed length in front of me at his desk. We have a comfy home, but our bedroom is our haven, where all the fun takes place, where our most special possessions are held, where our deepest convos take place.

On our bed I move forwards and backwards, up, down, and around focusing on therapeutic posture while I massage my hubby; I lay upside down on our bed while he sits in his desk chair and rubs my often sore low back.

My morning wake up is to prayer and yoga postures in bed; and I use our bed as a cushy yoga mat for helping my husband do supported restorative yoga.

We have Netflix dates on our bed to series like Sherlock or Agatha Christie's Poirot.

I have been known to shut the bedroom door after coming home from shopping so I can do lingerie peep shows for my love.

We finally put the cat tree by our bedroom window and now the kitties are on it all the time. They like being where mommy and daddy are.

Yes, it is a small room. The bed definitely is central both physically and spiritually. I waited way too impatiently for a marriage bed with my man! I got it now! I cherish it! Our walls are covered in photos; and red sparkly lights; Christmas, cat, cute, and of course geeky paraphernalia; and above the middle of our bed a guardian angel painting resides, stalwart and ready to defend our claim that love conquers all!

Illustration by Puuung

"Practice the Pause"

I stay so much of the time in a cerebral space. I think that is why yoga and cooking are such freedom for me. I am able to disengage from the intensity of a constant flow of ideas and take in at face value the sensations of senses and emotions.

One thing my yoga teacher said this week is that in yoga we "practice the pause" a lot. We take the time to hold a posture a little longer to find release. We stop to just breathe in-between poses to experience the cleansing gasps that still our minds and open up every part of our bodies.

Many people practice asanas (yoga poses) to prepare their bodies for meditation. I actually find that for me, in the process of that which is more body action as opposed to mind action, I am in a state of meditation. The mind is getting a break from thinking and a beautiful boost from the endorphin release of physical movement.

In the mornings before I get out of bed, I stretch and I pray. Sometimes when I'm fully cognizant, I can't quite remember my prayer. But this half asleep, half awake moving and sleepy words to Jesus have a magical feel to them. They set my entire day with a sense of awakening to the invisible. The light of the sun and the light of the Son become the morning greeting that ignites my day.

Illustration by Gyo Fujikawa

Joy Thirst

"So, I guess we are Mr. and Mrs. Kringle!" My husband said to me a couple of days ago.

Well, we do exude a tremendous amount of jolly-ness. We live by the prescription of the book of Proverbs that a merry heart is good medicine, and being awe-struck by God is refreshment to the bones.

We are that couple. The one where I ask the kitties what they want on TV when we go out to eat, and my husband compromises with me and says to play music for them instead. And I jump in the car after turning on Nat King Cole's Holiday mix and say, (in September mind you), "The kitties are so excited about Christmas!!! They are running around the house to the music!!!"

We literally get giddy happy about the littlest things, like a night watching the last episode of Agatha Christie's Poirot while we have an at home date with chicken salad and Club crackers that we whipped up together. And didn't even annoy each other in the kitchen, a big feat for us ;)

Or hubby reads, "The Little Blue Truck" for the kitties and the grand kids and has an entire restaurant happily mesmerized with all his sound effects of little trucks, dump trucks, and a variety of animals. "Why", I asked him, "did that capture so much attention?" "Because everyone is so hungry for any happiness they can find," He answered.

We are dying of joy thirst!

Have you heard what Jesus says? “I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace. In the world you have tribulation and distress and suffering, but be courageous [be confident, be undaunted, be filled with joy]; I have overcome the world.” [My conquest is accomplished, My victory abiding.]
JHN 16:33

Boom! Victory! Every reason to CELEBRATE! Be undaunted! Overflowing with laughter!

Dinner Time

I must write about dinner time.

Through many factors of my life, I have created myself into an introvert.

I love being home with my husband and our kitty cats.

I wish to entertain, love the preparation of me in the kitchen with Hallmark movies playing, but I freeze up horribly if actual human beings come over. My only coping mechanism is to sit on the couch with alcohol, laughing and smiling at the right time.

I think traveling sounds lovely, but I know I would be craving home the whole time. For our wedding anniversary, we might go out to dinner, but we adore being at our home, in our bed. When it is not agreeable with your children (aka cats) to leave home, suddenly your home becomes your own little universe!

Somehow, all comfort and joy are enclosed in those four walls with those select few that don't incite panic attacks.

And don't misunderstand me, it is not the people themselves most of the time that cause my panic. It is me. And it is residual shell shock from being formerly one who trusted too easily.

So when I finally made the transition during daily dinner time from sitting on the couch away from the household; which consists of my parents in-law, my hubby and I, along with our gaggle of cats; to sitting at my space at the dinner table, I felt a mini-revolution had taken place. I was sitting with the family and I was engaging and chatting and laughing and I was okay. I actually liked feeling a part.

Bravery is realized through baby steps.

So much terror is interlaced with me feeling like I have to be the entertainer or keep the convo going.

I'm beginning to loosen the stakes, to let go of it being my responsibility, to free myself of any need to perform or stay bubbly if I really am hurting.

I can be me, with my hang-ups, and my need for the protection of mimosas, and the transforming permission that it's not my job to make everyone feel comfortable.

Then meal time becomes about  relaxation, relief, and refreshment. Exactly what is was meant to be all along!

Illustration by M. Boulanger

Chicken Dinner for the Soul: Chicken Fried Rice

So this is a yummy and healthy dish. My cooking intention these days is veggie, protein, starch; comforting; simple; healthful; and as few pans and dishes as possible.

Chicken Fried Rice

I adore my rice cooker. You throw in rice and liquid and it always turns out perfectly. Main thing is, get the rice going early 'cause it does take a while to cook. I made about 4 cups.

I used 2 big cans of canned chicken, which I opened right away..so the kitties could have their highly anticipated (and not at all a patiently waited for) chicken juice.

Now the veggies can be kinda anything. This is a great meal to clean out your produce drawer. I used celery, onions (I add onions and garlic in large quantities to almost every savory dish I bake. See my garlic trick below), green bell peppers, and carrots.

Now another appliance I adore is my food processor. I used the slicer to put my veggies through.

In olive oil, I sauted the veggies. I used a wok to cook in.

I also added in some greens after the veggies were al dente which is a perfect way to get your salad in. They will wilt and blend in nicely.

I added some Maggi Jugo Seasoning Sauce or Soy Sauce, Garlic Powder, Seasoning Salt.

I put veggies in a bowl and set aside.

In olive oil, I scrambled 6 eggs, then added more Maggi Jugo Seasoning Sauce or Soy Sauce, and Seasoning Salt. Then I crumbled and threw in the drained chicken.

When rice was done, I added it and the veggies to the egg/chicken mixture, fried it up some on high, adding a little more olive oil, and stirring consistently, and double checked the seasoning. My meal was ready, an entire meal right there in one pan. Serve in bowls with hot mustard and soy sauce.


* My Garlic Trick: Take a bulb or 2 or 3 of  Garlic, the entire bulb, not individual cloves. Do not peel. Just put the Garlic on a sheet of aluminum foil and drizzle with olive oil. Close up foil over Garlic and put in a 350 ° oven for 30 to 40 minutes. Let cool some, the Garlic should just slide out of skin, and be able to be mushed with a fork. Sometimes I add a little water as I'm mashing to make a thin paste. Then I add it to my dish and mix well.

Illustration here: http://pin.it/H9dV590

Loved

A few days ago I was reading picture books to the kitty babies. My husband was in the grandparents' room talking to his mom. After a few minutes, I stopped hearing talking and I looked down the hall into my in laws room and didn't see anyone. 

I was raised with the forboding fear that anyone not in God's family will get left behind when Jesus comes to get His kids. Always watching, worrying about people whose faith was not precisely and doctrinally correct. Worrying about myself, if I would hit the mark. 

I had the old initial fear, that day reading picture books to kitties, of being left behind. Then I kind of got angry. "My gosh, ummm, hello?" I thought emphatically, "What about me! I know I definately should have been taken!!!" 

In a split second, I realized I had finally caught on! God loves everyone without strings attached! God chooses everyone! And on this day when I unconsciously went through this angry and demanding mini soliouquy in my head, I realized that this is not about me and my perfect faith or dogma or anything in my brain. 

It had finally dawned on my heart that this is the only way God knows to be. He always loves. He always chooses. The only King to die for His very own creation. He says, "Yes. Come"! The first and final Yes! 

My audacious claim at belonging to Him surprised me! But I liked it! It felt powerful. It felt royal. Now, I don't cower in unworthiness, but I proudly claim my birthright, my inheritance, my dadgum heavenly mansion as a daughter of the King!

Anne Lamott says, "I didn't need to understand the hypostatic union of the Trinity; I just needed to turn my life over to whoever came up with redwood trees."

I think God made the Bible confusing, for one, ummm because He's God. No way can we analyze His genuis. And, more importantly, so that one day, hopefully, we will stop emphasizing our differences, stop analyzing hearts and motives..all that stuff that is between only God and you; and we will begin to follow the only two things He asked, to love Him and to love each other..One day..

Illustration found http://pin.it/Ufr_7AU

Illustration by Sarah Jane 

Sacred Sundays

So today was like a magical surprise!

I love to cook for people!!! Usually I shop on Mondays and cook on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. But last week I found that Sunday morning is the sacred shopping time!!!

And I mean this in all sense of the word sacred. Weather is cool so energy and breathing are fresh and alive! Crowds are sparse but enough to be able to flash joy smiles all around and be extra thankful for those who work to make shopping a pleasure! I blared worship music in the car, singing along loud and happy!
It was pretty cool!

And even cooler because of how I woke up! I've started a new waking up ritual. I actually stretch and pray in bed before I get up. And total honesty here, I take a caffeine pill to help rouse me. Totally un-Zen of me I know. But it works for me and it starts my day off beautifully.

This morning was extra sweet because I had in my head the old Gospel song, "His Name is Wonderful!" My grandfather, whom we affectionately called Big Daddy loved this song! At every special occasion, he wanted his grand kids to sing it! All the lyrics are beautiful, but simply the title is what struck me this morning.

His Name IS Wonderful! The word "wonderful" is like a sparkling burst of magic, glory, and Christmas gifts all in one!!! I love that baby God, Jesus, came to be with us, bringing all His wonderful-ness along to sprinkle generously on us!!!

I am an introvert. Time with people gets overwhelming in big chunks, but I love the little vignettes of time with customers or workers in the checkout line. It has become a source of bravery and blessing to me. Carrying His gifts of glory and deep magic in connecting and big smiles, little chats, and generous thank you's! It works and it makes my heart glad!

Illustration by Norman Rockwell 

Yummy Repetitive Power Flow

Take a few breaks during today to practice this yummy yoga repetitive flow. 

1. Roll out your yoga mat in a cozy homey space, and place two blocks so that your hands can set down on them in Downward Facing Dog. Come onto knees with hands on blocks. Stack knees over ankles and shoulders over wrists. Push your hips and bottom up to the sky. Ground into straight arms and legs. Experience the release in the lengthening of the spine. Feel connection in the four corners of your hands and feet. Push the earth away from you. Let your head hang loosely. If you want, try some organic movement, like pedaling your feet or lifting a leg off the ground for 3-Legged Dog. 

Illustration by Alison E. Kurek

2. Now step one foot forward in between blocks and bend that knee, keeping knee stacked over ankle. If you can, stretch your back leg further back and curl up your toes. Now place your hands on your front knee and practice balance. Keep hips squared and facing front. Keep back and torso on a slight forward incline. You are in High Lunge. 

Illustration by whenguineapigsfly.com

3. Now lift your arms to the sky, next to ears, palms facing. Slowly vertebre by vertebra lift to a verticle torso and spine. Plant the entire back foot down and turn it to a 45 degree angle. Warrior 1! 

Illustration by Evgeniya Gapchinska

As you go from Downward Facing Dog to High Lunge to Warrior 1, take your time. Practice the balance. Setting your gaze on a fixed object assists with balance. Feel the solar plexus chakra of power as you go from head low to head, torso, spine, and arms lifted high!

Repeat a few times. Then close in the surrender and release of Downward Facing Dog. Namaste  <3

Illustration by claudiatremblay

Beginnings..Bare Bones of Beauty

One thing I have discovered in my year of yoga teacher training is the bare bones of beauty.

The simplicity that is me showing up to life, no filters, no touchups; with only my armor of joy and hope. Joy is the spice and hope is the light. My favorite word and concept is “cozy” and my apparatus is the body.

I am learning to segment my life very loosely and welcome pieces of one activity falling into another, and many times blending beautifully. New creations always emerge from the hook ups of unimaginable combos.

Before a yoga practice, at morning coffee, at the beginning of a new season or project; we learn from yoga the sacred necessity of setting an intention. There is bare beauty here. And it can change with life's tide; but let in be basic, bare, only that which is needed.

My life work is moving the body, feeding, healing through touch, telling stories.

My teachers are a handful of down to earth, honest women; and being a mom to animal babies.

My understanding of God extends from the creative discourse I have with my “take God out of a box” husband and the sweetness of Christmas.

My therapy is yoga and water. Beautiful movement and splashes of refreshment.

A smile, pearl earrings, my wedding band, a spritz of White Shoulders fragrance, and a string of necklaces are my makeup.

Prayer is my hope weapon.

And my confidence extends from sitting, walking, and holding my body in a way that radiates happiness and health.

Any time I start being bored and begin to exhibit my nemesis impatience; at a red light, standing in line, waiting for an appointment, waiting for anything, I can practice yoga.

Yoga enhances my activities. When we’re chatting in the pool, I can practice aqua yoga. When we’re watching a movie, I can practice yoga. Even now as I write, I have my body is a yummy reclined mermaid twist.

I’ve wished for so long that I could move my body like the stunning dancer my baby sister is. Last year, she taught me some dance and was my cheerleader the whole time!

I know the magic that yoga has been for me this year was jumpstarted by those who cheer me on daily: people, animals, and the Creator of this whole rigmarole! I bow gratefully and with a huge smile!!!

Comment below breezy, bright, and roomy activities that are uniquely you!

Illustration by Rebecca Green

Illustration by Vanessa Fahy